What Happens When You Chase Unrealistic Dreams

What Happens When You Chase Unrealistic Dreams

There are dreams that look too big to chase.
And then there are dreams that feel too familiar to ignore.

We call them unrealistic.
But what if they are just… unresolved?

The First Dream I Couldn’t Speak Out Loud

I remember being 16.
Sitting in a classroom where everyone wanted to be an engineer or doctor. I wanted to speak. Write. Build something from thoughts. That didn’t fit into a career chart.

So I stayed quiet.

That silence followed me for years.

Even when I started my first podcast, I wasn’t chasing virality. I was chasing something I didn’t have words for at the time, proof that what I carry inside has value when spoken out loud.

The Hidden Psychology Behind “Unrealistic”

Most people think unrealistic dreams are about ego.

But often, they are about identity.

They don’t come from wanting to impress. They come from wanting to feel whole.

Psychologists call this self-actualization – when the mind reaches for something that aligns with its deepest needs. Not just survival. Not even success. Meaning.

But there is a shadow side.

When a dream is fueled by a wound, when it’s built to undo a past where you felt ignored, unseen, or never good enough it starts to carry emotional weight it was never meant to hold.

When Your Dream Becomes an Emotional Burden

You start equating progress with healing.
You confuse validation with worth.
You treat setbacks like personal rejection.

And suddenly, the dream you loved becomes the storm you fear.

It’s Not Procrastination. It’s Emotional Safety.

I have seen this with creators I come across or work with.

They say they want to start a podcast. But weeks go by. Nothing launches.
They say they want to grow on LinkedIn. But their drafts stay unpublished.
They say they want clarity but stay addicted to overthinking.

It’s not laziness. It’s emotional protection.

Because what if I give it my all… and it still fails?
What if I speak… and no one listens?

The brain sees that as a repetition of childhood pain not just professional risk.

This is why dreaming feels so personal. Because it is.

It’s your nervous system asking:
“Can I be more than what I have survived?”

The Dream Isn’t Supposed to Heal You

But here’s what no one tells you:

You don’t have to shrink your dream.
You just have to take back its job.

Your dream is not responsible for healing your past.
That’s your work.
The dream is just the bridge. The expression. The proof that your inner voice matters enough to be externalized.

Let it be that.

Sometimes I still catch myself chasing perfection, redesigning, rewriting, delaying launch.

But now I pause.

Not because the dream is wrong. But because I have loaded it with an old hope: “Maybe if this works, I’ll finally feel enough.”

That’s not the dream’s work.
That’s mine.

Many of us come from backgrounds where dreaming beyond survival was seen as a luxury. In this podcast episode, I talk about how middle-class beliefs like safety over risk, obedience over expression shape what we think we deserve, and how that affects our biggest dreams. Click Here

The Wound and the Work

So if your dreams feel too big… check what part of you is still small.

Because dreams aren’t lies.
They are attempts.
To love. To matter. To repair.

Not every unrealistic dream is escapism.
Some are echoes.

And until you meet that echo not with shame, but with structure you will keep chasing instead of creating.

You are not wrong for dreaming.
You are just overdue for separating the wound from the work.